Mike's grandfather clock suddenly stops working right one day, so he loads it into his van and takes it to a clock repair shop.
In the shop is a little old man who insists he is Swiss, and has a heavy German accent.
He asks Mike, "Vat sims to be ze problem?"
Mike says, "I'm not sure, but it doesn't go "tick-tock-tick-tock" anymore.
Now it just goes "tick...tick...tick."
The old man says, "Mmm-Hm!" and steps behind the counter, where he rummages around a bit. He emerges with a huge flashlight and walks over the grandfather clock.
He turns the flashlight on, and shines it directly into the clocks face.
Then he says in a menacing voice...
Ve haf vays of making you tock!"