Q. Why do we have a Thanksgiving holiday?
A. So we know when to start Christmas shopping!
Q. What would you get if you crossed a turkey with an evil spirit?
A. A poultrygeist!
Q. Who is not hungry at Thanksgiving?
A. The turkey, he’s already stuffed!
Q. What are unhappy cranberries called?
A. Blueberries!
Q. What’s the best thing to put into a pumpkin pie?
A. Your teeth.
Q. Why didn’t the Pilgrim want to make the bread?
A. It’s a crummy job.
Q. What would you get if you crossed a turkey with a baked fruit dessert?
A. Peach gobbler!
Q. Why did the pilgrim’s pants keep falling off?
A. The buckle was on his hat!
Q. What would you get if you crossed a Pilgrim with a type of cracker?
A. A Pilgraham!
Q. If the Pilgrims were alive today, what would they be most famous for?
A. Their age!
Q. What would you get if you crossed Thanksgiving and Easter?
A. Feaster Sunday!
Q. Why did the Pilgrim eat a candle?
A. He wanted a light snack!
Q. Where did the Pilgrims come from?
A. Their parents, of course!
Q. How does a turkey drink wine?
A. In a gobble-let.
Q. What did General Patton do on Thanksgiving?
A. He gave tanks.
Q. What do turkeys use to clean themselves?
A. They use "feather dusters"!
Q. Why did the Pilgrims eat turkey on Thanksgiving?
A. They couldn't get the moose in the oven!
Q. What was the main thing the Pilgrims did during the first winter?
A. Starve.
Q. Why did Johnny get such low grades after Thanksgiving?
A. Because everything is marked down after the holidays.
Q. What do you get after eating way too much turkey and dressing?
A. Dessert, of course!
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Category: Thanksgiving Type: One Liners 
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