Tax Jokes and Quotes
Do you realize that some tax forms ask you to check a box if
you are BLIND?
Quote: "Two years ago it was impossible to get through on
the phone to the IRS. Now it's just hard to get through.
-Charles Rossotti, former IRS Commissioner
Disappointed that you never had time to write the great
American novel? Don't fret, just go dig out your past tax
Quote: "The Eiffel Tower is the Empire State Building after
Under the Freedom of Information Act, a man with a small
business sent a request to the IRS asking if they had a file
on him. The IRS wrote back, "There is now."
Quote: "It would be nice if we could all pay our taxes with
a smile, but normally cash is required."
Q: Who audits IRS agents?
Quote: "Next to being shot at and missed, nothing is quite
as satisfying as an income tax refund."
Q: How do you drive a CPA insane?
A: Fill out Form 1040EZ.
Quote: "The government deficit is the difference between the
amount of money the government spends and the amount it has
the nerve to collect."
Why is it that when the IRS loses a tax return, it is
considered a mistake, but when you lose a receipt, it is
considered tax evasion?
Quote: "The wages of sin are death, but by the time taxes
are taken out, it's just sort of a tired feeling."
Q: How do you humble a person that flaunts their wealth?
A: Have them fill out a tax return.
Quote: "Even when you make a tax form out on the level, you
don't know when it's through if you are a crook or a
Q: Why is a tax audit like a tornado?
A: There's a lot of screaming and you end up losing your house.
Quote: "When are we going to be allowed to list the
government as a dependent?"
People often say death and taxes are the same, but this
is wrong. Death is a taxable event, but taxes never die.