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Audience: General    Humor Rating: 1 1    Category: Christmas    Type: One Liners
CLICK TO E-MAIL What did the dog breeder get when she crossed an Irish Setter with a Pointer at Christmastime?
A "pointsetter"!

What do sheep say to each other at Christmastime?
Merry Christmas to ewe!

What do sheep say to shepherds at Christmastime?
Season's Bleatings!

How do sheep say Merry Christmas in Mexico?
Fleece Navidad!

How do Chihuahuas say Merry Christmas?
Fleas Navidog!

What's the best thing to put into Christmas dinner?
Your teeth!

Why should Christmas dinner always be well done?
So you can say "Merry Crispness"!

A definition of Christmas:
The time when everyone gets "Santa"-mental.

What’s red, white and blue at Christmas time?
A sad candy cane!

What did one Christmas cracker say to the other Christmas cracker?
My POP is bigger than yours!

Knock Knock.
Who's there?
Donut.
Donut who?
Donut open 'til Christmas!

What do you call an elf who steals gift wrap from the rich and gives it to the poor?
Ribbon Hood!

What comes at the end of Christmas Day?
The letter "Y"!

What do angry mice send to each other in December?
Cross-mouse cards!

What did Adam say on the day before Christmas?
It's Christmas, Eve!

What happens if you eat too many Christmas decorations?
You get "Tinsel"-itis!

"Do you ever buy Christmas seals?"
"No, I wouldn't know how to feed them."

What is the best key to get at Christmas?
A turkey!

What's the best thing to give your parents for Christmas?
A list of everything you want!

Why is it so cold at Christmas?
Because it's in Decembrrrr!

What kind of Christmas tree comes from Hawaii?
"O Tanning Palms"!

What do wild animals sing at Christmastime?
Jungle bells, jungle bells, jungle all the way!

What's the favorite Christmas Carol of new parents?
Silent Night!

Where do mistletoe go to become famous?
"Holly" wood!

A Christmas thought:
STRESSED is just DESSERTS spelled backward.

Why do Mummies like Christmas so much?
Because of all the wrapping!




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