Oregon Dumb City Laws:
• You must buy a $10 permit to be allowed to install a burglar alarm.
• It is illegal to show movies or attend a car race on Sundays.
• It is legal to conduct a horse race or a symphony concert.
• Juggling is strictly prohibited without a license.
• It’s illegal to walk down a sidewalk and knock a snakes head off with your cane.
• You cannot eat a doughnut and walk backwards on a city street.
• Ministers are forbidden from eating garlic or onions before delivering a sermon.
• One may not box with a kangaroo.
• Shoelaces must be tied while walking down the street.
• It’s against the law for a wedding ceremony to be performed at a skating rink.
• People may not whistle underwater.
• You cannot wear roller skates in restrooms.
• No one may attempt to cause someone to think that their property may be subjected to “offensive physical contact”.
• Minors may not enter a room where a “social game” is being played.
• Trucks may not be parked on the street.
• Riders of sleds may not attach themselves to passing cars.
• Persons may not pass through a “traffic congestion thoroughfare” more than twice per night.
• Women may not wrestle in Salem.
• It is illegal to own a reptile within the city limits, unless you are a school or city, as a pet.
• It is against the law for animals to have sex in the city limits.
• Cloth towel dispensers are banned from restrooms.
• No more than two people may share a single drink.
• It is illegal to predict the future.
• No one may allow their cellar door to remain open.