What does Frankenstein’s monster call a screwdriver? Daddy.
What do you call a mouse that can pick up a monster? Sir.
First monster: I have a hunch. Second monster: I thought you were a funny shape.
How do you address a monster? Very politely.
What should you call a polite, friendly, kind, good looking monster? A failure.
Why was the monster standing on his head? He was turning things over in his mind.
What did Frankenstein’s monster say when he was struck by lightning? Thanks, I needed that.
1st Monster: "What is that son of yours doing these days?"
2nd Monster: "He’s at medical school."
1st Monster: "Oh, What’s he studying?"
2nd Monster: "Nothing, they re studying him!"
What do sea monsters have for dinner? Fish and ships.
Waiter on ocean liner: "Would you like the menu, sir?"
Monster: "No thanks, just bring me the passenger list."
Did you hear about the monster who sent his picture to a lonely hearts club? They sent it back saying they weren’t that lonely!
Why did Frankenstein’s monster give up boxing? Because he didn’t want to spoil his looks.
What did Dr. Frankenstein get when he put his goldfish’s brain in the body of his dog? I don’t know, but it is great at chasing submarines.
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Category: Halloween Type: One Liners 
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