God and Moses were out golfing. They were both doing well. Then they came up to the 5th hole.
It was a dogleg to the left, with a lake to the right. Moses got up and hit a long shot with a little hook. Right in the middle of the fairway. Then God got up and pulled out his driver.
Moses said,"God, every time you use your driver you always slice it."
So God said, "If Arnold Palmer can do it, I can do it." So he approached the ball, got ready, and hit a long one. It drifted to the right, SPLASH!, right in the middle of the lake.
So Moses said, "See God, I told you that would happen. I'll get it this time, but you'll have to get it next time." So Moses went out to the lake, held up his club, and parted the lake. Then he went down, picked up the ball, and came back. After that, everything went fine -- until the 18th hole, straight away, with a long lake on the right. Moses hit a nice straight shot down the fairway. Then God took out his driver.
Moses said, "God, last time you used your driver you sliced it. You always slice it."
And God repeated, "If Arnold Palmer can do it, I can do it." So he got up, and hit the ball. Long hard shot, sliced, PLUNK!
Moses said, "I got the last one." So God walked on the water, bent over, picked up the ball. About this time there was a foursome coming up behind them. One if the guys saw what God was doing and asked Moses, "Who does that guy think he is, Jesus?"
Moses replied, "No. He thinks he's Arnold Palmer."
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Category: Golf Type: Stories 
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